Separate the mistake, not the person

Argument, Nonverbal communication, Prince Charming,

Separate the mistake, not the person

You were in love and decided to spend the rest of your life together, but after marriage, Prince Charming turned into a frog and the princess became boring. If, along the years, being close to your loved one has stopped being pleasurable and has become unbearable, keep reading…

This is what is happening with many couples. Do you think it is still possible to fulfil the vow “until death do us part”?

Yes! All you have to do is eliminate whatever wants to separate you before death – the mistakes.

Mistakes are what separate you from your loved one. The problems that you face in marriage are the results of the mistakes that you make – excessive jealousy, a lack of tolerance and patience, accusations from the past, placing family before your spouse – just like body language and an aggressive tone of voice are common problems among people that they are unable to see.

What normally happens is that one only notices one’s partner’s mistakes and focuses on them; it is difficult to notice your own mistakes. Aside from this, instead of treating the mistake by isolating it from your loved one, what ends up happening is that the loved one and the mistake are treated as one. Consequently, you blame your partner for the situation in the relationship.

So, instead of separating yourself from your loved one, separate the mistakes that you are making. Stop making mistakes.

In order to solve the problem with jealousy, analyse the situation very well. Check if it is not stemming from the fruit of your insecurities and dialogue with your partner. In regard to your partner’s mistakes, they will not end by you pointing them out. It is when you look at your own mistakes and change those that the other person’s mistakes become visible to him/her and they will be motivated to change.

Change only happens when we see the need to change. The solution is to focus on yourself so that your partner can focus on themselves.

If you separate your mistakes, your mistakes will not separate you.

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