Fausto: I loved my wife and kids immensely, but I was very reserved and didn’t express this outwardly. Our home was so quiet, that even with three children, it was rare to hear the sound of laughter and chatter between us.
I was trying to open my own business, but without any direction, I failed three times. Despite the financial strain this would cause, I never spoke with my wife about any of my attempts to start a business. She expressed her annoyance about the secrecy in our marriage, but I would always dismiss her concerns. During this time, my wife was invited to attend the Universal Church by a mutual friend. She would constantly invite me to join her, but I was reluctant at first.
Ekundayo: The messages I received in the meetings really helped me to better deal with my husband’s cold behaviour. I never gave up believing that my family would one day be united, and I did my best to be a good example at home. However, years passed and I noticed no change in him because he was headstrong and inflexible.
Fausto: I noticed that my wife and daughter changed, because they made efforts to help more at home. However, I attended the church for 8 years without taking anything seriously, to the point that I didn’t even have a Bible. My wife fought for many years to better our marriage, but she was fighting alone because I didn’t want to change, even though I knew that my stubbornness was tearing my family apart.
I hit rock bottom when my wife and I separated. I was devastated, and after years of feeling indifferent to the situation in my family, I was now faced with my reality and I was desperate. I wanted to restore my family, but I knew that this would only be possible if I first worked on myself. The change didn’t happen overnight. I progressively began to apply all of the advice I had received over the years. I started by asking my wife for forgiveness, as I finally acknowledged how my previous actions hurt her and affected our family.
Ekundayo: When he started to apply the teachings, his nature changed, and I noticed this transformation in him when I’d see him around the church. That’s when I decided to give him another chance. This time around, there was more communication between us, and he was now a more affectionate husband.
Fausto: We would separate some time every weekend to sit and read books from the church together, Bulletproof Marriage and 120 Minutes to Shield Your Marriage. We took notes and discussed them as we went along, and the lessons from these books helped us to improve our communication with one another.
We started working together to raise our three beautiful children and to resolve any problems that we were faced with. As well as this, we started to attend the Love Therapy seminars together, which also taught us how to build a relationship that is solid and pleasant.
My relationship with my children began to develop, as I started making time to invest in them. Today, our home is a lively and peaceful environment to be in, and this year we celebrate 14 years of marriage.
Fausto De Carvalho and Ekundayo Goode