I hated my body from the age of 8. I did well academically but my insecurity made me so unhappy in later life. I did a degree in Fashion and Design and took on a part-time job in Tescos to finance myself. I was living out my dream but I still felt really down. I would often go out clubbing with friends and go out with work colleagues on a Friday night.
I would get all dressed up but was still overly shy and weight-conscious. I never really enjoyed myself and just couldn’t shake off the negative feelings. I used to think, ‘Why does no one want to be with me?’ ‘Why don’t I have a boyfriend?’ My mind told me there was something wrong with me. I ended up having to work full-time in Tescos as I couldn’t get any other job I applied for.
Two and half years after qualifying I still wasn’t working in the field I wanted and I felt so empty. I didn’t bother applying for any more jobs as I didn’t have the confidence to fill out an application form.
I was invited to the UCKG by Armando who I met at work. He was positive and motivated and knew what he wanted. I attended on a Monday evening and was advised to return on Sunday. During the prayer I felt so good that I just had to return.
Each Sunday I attended, I felt stronger within myself. The self-hatred started to disappear and was replaced with confidence, self-respect and a desire to do better in my life. The meetings encouraged me to challenge those old negative thoughts that were dictating my life and to trust that with God on my side I was in a win-win situation. As I gained confidence, I kept sending out my CV. I got a job working in a bank, which was better. Armando and I had gotten closer and we began a relationship and later married.
I am now really happy in all areas of my life. I was able to start loving myself and believe that others also could love me. Complexes and self-hatred can stop a person from living. You get all these negative ideas in your head that hold you back from trying new things or even enjoying what you already have. I’ll never forget what God has done for me. I’m so thankful for my transformed life that my dream changed from working in the fashion industry to reaching out to others who are unhappy.
I now work to help the UCKG reach out to the millions of people that need help. I’m at a good place in life right now. But my faith tells me that God has lots more for me. My husband and I are determined for big things.
